Myth: I should not be vulnerable with my partner as it would make me look weak. Also, exposing my emotions might scare him.
Fact: Being vulnerable in a relationship means taking a risk. There is a chance of getting hurt, but there is also a chance of connection and growth. Vulnerability fosters closeness, trust, and intimacy.
Little gestures go a long way in a relationship. Bear hugs, a good bye kiss before leaving for work, bringing home a small gift, or snack, etc are seemingly small deeds but have a great positive impact on a relationship.
No two individuals are alike. And expecting that one’s partner would be similar to us in every way would be unfair. It puts pressure on the relationship which might lead to conflicts in the long run. It is important that both partners feel free and unconfined in a relationship for it to nurture.
When we fight, one of us tries to stay calm and not make it a win-loss ego situation. It doesn't mean don't share your point of view, instead, wait for the nerves to have calmed down.
My partner would sometimes react strongly to a situation and it would catch me off guard. Over time we learnt to talk about it once things calmed down and it helped me better understand her triggers and how i can avoid them.
I unknowingly started expecting my partner to be a reflection of myself, often asking "why can't you also" when pointing out things I do. But I realized that he brings his own strengths to the relationship, and expecting him to mirror me is not fair or healthy.