Sheetal gave birth to our beautiful baby girl in December 2019 and it completely changed our lives. As a man though, my wife's pregnancy was also a whole new learning for me. I learnt how to cope with mood swings, I learnt how to be kind and empathetic, and most of all I learnt how to live with no sex!
Sheetal was my first girlfriend and for as long as we have been together, we have been extremely sexually active. So when the doctor told her that pregnancy could be slightly complicated and that we would need to abstain from any penetration, whatsoever, she seemed okay with it, but I was pretty dazed.
You see, Sheetal was experiencing new things in her body and her mind was distracted. But I was still the same old person, and it wasn't like I was desperate, but I had my needs. Nothing had really changed for me, except that my wife was pregnant and that I had to devote all my efforts towards ensuring that she was happy!
So I tried to 'take things in my own hands' and it was like a throwback to college days. Sheetal and I tried making out, but she would often want to throw up, I am hoping because of the pregnancy and not me. I distracted myself with video games, weekly football sessions in order to release my energy. But nothing, of course could replace the act of sex.
It was then that I understood why my dad always said 'Do you even know how much we have compromised for you?' After so many months of no sex, I was ready to say that to my kid! I eventually accepted that it was what it was and I'd just have to wait. Sheetal's belly just kept getting bigger and every inch was a reminder that we'd soon be back to getting physically intimate again.
By her 7th month, my attention was automatically diverted to her well-being. I guess my paternal hormones had finally kicked and all I could think about was how I would keep my wife and child safe and give them the best life ever. I was going to be a father, and boy was I feeling ready for it!
The next two months flew by and in the wee hours of the morning of 15th December, 2019, Sheetal went into labour. I had already prepared her hospital bag, and was all set to take her to the hospital. And even in this state, my mind kept telling me that soon, I will be having sex. But for that moment, I shut my brain up and just focussed on getting Sheetal to the labour room, safely.
Soon after we were blessed with our daughter. And when I held her in my arms, nothing else in the whole mattered anymore. She was worth every compromise I would ever have to make in life. Sheetal and I had completed our family, and everything else seemed insignificant.
My wife and I obviously got back to our frisky selves in not time, and life felt normal again. And to all the dads to be out there who may be struggling with their needs, I would say keep your eyes on the prize and just take care of your wives. This abstinence will be worth the wait!
