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In today's fast-paced world, it is easy to get caught up in work, family responsibilities, and other distractions, leaving little time for couples to connect with each other.

10 Couples Share Why They Struggle To Spend Quality Time

couple quality time

In today's fast-paced world, finding time for couples to connect can be challenging due to work, family responsibilities, and other distractions. Relationship experts emphasize the importance of spending quality time together to maintain a healthy and strong relationship.

Spending quality time with your loved ones is not just about celebrating special occasions like anniversaries or birthdays or going on fancy dates. It's about  the smallest moments, like catching up for a few minutes after work and being fully present both physically and emotionally or cooking dinner for them when they are tired.

These small gestures allows couples to:

  • Deepen their emotional connection and foster a sense of intimacy. 
  • Have better communication and conflict-resolution skills. 
  • To be happier, more satisfied, and less likely to drift apart, emotionally.

Spending quality time as a couple can be challenging, but we spoke to 10 couples this week to learn why and how they resolve it. Each relationship is unique, but their stories can inspire you to be more mindful and take proactive steps in your own relationship.

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Quality Time: Understanding the Love Language for Healthy Relationships

1. Work and Career Demands

Anil, a 30-year-old from Pune, Maharashtra, shares, "My wife Ritu and I were caught up with our demanding jobs, always on our phones for work even after hours. We realized we were neglecting our relationship during a chat after dinner one day, and it made us feel like we had no time for each other."

Ritu chimes in, sharing that she often felt neglected and sad. Anil recalls, "This realization came just two years after our wedding. That's when we decided to set boundaries with our work." Ritu elaborates, "We communicated with our colleagues and employers about when we would be available for work-related communication outside of regular work hours. This helped us separate our work and personal lives."

Anil adds, "We also made a conscious effort to leave our work at the office. No more bringing laptops or documents home with us. This allowed us to focus on each other when we were at home." Ritu acknowledges that it wasn't easy, but the effort was worth it. "We are both happier now that we prioritize our relationship," she says with a smile.

2. Family Responsibilities

"We realized that we needed to find a way to balance our parenting duties with our relationship. We started by scheduling some alone time for ourselves when our baby girl was asleep or being cared for by family," said Shilpa Gohel, a new mother from Ahmedabad.

"We also prioritized date nights which helped us to reconnect and also talk about what's going on with each other's lives, how we can support each other, and discuss concerns before they became too big," Shilpa added with enthusiasm.

"The foremost solution was to share parenting duties which helped us reduce the workload and allowed us to spend more time together," added Akash, Shilpa's husband.

"Secondly, we sought support from family, friends, or professional services if we were feeling overwhelmed or needed help with our parenting duties," Akash further explained.

3. Technological Distractions

Rahul and Nisha Chandra from Surat in Gujarat share that post the COVID-19 pandemic era, till last year in 2022, they were constantly glued to their phones and other devices, which left little time for us to connect with each other. Rahul informs, “We didn't realize how addicted we had become to our phones until we started nagging each other for not giving enough time. It made us realize that we needed to be more mindful of our technology use and disconnect when we were together. So, we started setting aside some technology-free time each day to focus on each other without distractions.”

Nisha remembers, "We had a rule to avoid using phones during meals or quality time together. It helped us be more present and enjoy our time together to the fullest."

4. Communication Issues

Karan and Priya Ramesh, a couple from Indore, Madhya Pradesh, realized they were growing distant due to a lack of focused communication. Priya, being an extrovert, brought it to Karan's attention. Initially, Karan didn't pay heed, but as the strain increased, he realized it was time to take action.

Karan shares, "We started having regular conversations in our daily life, patiently listening to each other and finding solutions. I shifted from passive listening to active participation and even read books to work on myself. Priya is happy with this change."

Priya adds with a smile, "We also made a conscious effort to listen without interrupting or getting defensive. This improved our communication, making conflict resolution easier and allowing us to spend quality time together without tension. For us, quality time also meant focused conversations about our life as a couple, not just having fun."

5. Differences in Interests

Raj and Shweta Agrawal, a couple from Bhopal, Madhya Pradesh, initially felt poles apart in terms of their interests after getting married in 2017. Raj was into sports and outdoor activities, while Shweta enjoyed reading books and watching movies. Shweta recalls, "We tried to compromise and participate in each other's hobbies, but it didn't work out. We ended up feeling bored or frustrated." This led to them spending less time together.

Raj shares how they brought a change by prioritizing "common ME time together," saying, "We had an open conversation about our interests and agreed to try new activities as a couple. We started hiking, traveling, and trying new cuisines. By exploring new things, we discovered common ground and created shared experiences that strengthened our bond. This approach worked well, and we started enjoying quality time together again."

6. Mis-managed Household Chores

Ramesh and Sumati Mohapatra are a young couple from Bhubaneswar in Odisha. Their communication bond is impeccable, and with time their conversations made them realise that they didn't have enough time for each other in the absence of house help, which they could not afford for a full day. So what did they do? They divided chores based on their strengths and preferences. "Sameer loves to cook occasionally and helps with fixing the almirah and ironing clothes," shared Sumati. They also hired a part-time housemaid and made sure to schedule quality time together each week. "This allowed us to share household responsibilities and enjoy our time together more fully," added Ramesh.

7. Something Would Always Come Up

Rohan and Megha Sukhadia from Bhilwara, Rajasthan shar, “"We tried to spend time together, but something or the other would always come up, leaving us with little "WE" time and space. We realized we needed to make a conscious effort to set aside one day in the week where we wouldn't entertain any hindrances or people, unless it was an emergency."

"So, we started having a date night once a week (we've been together for six months), and if we miss it sometimes, we don't feel sad because we know we're trying our best", Rohan adds. "We take turns planning the date night, keeping things fresh and exciting. We also schedule some alone time to recharge and come back to the relationship feeling more present and engaged."

8. External Commitments

Arjun and Radhika Sharma, a couple from Lucknow, Uttar Pradesh, realized that their busy commitments to community, family, and social life were leaving them with little time for each other. Radhika expressed her concerns about their lack of "US TIME" as a couple.

Arjun took the initiative to create commitment charts for the month, prioritizing their relationship. He says, "We set boundaries and learned to say no to activities that would interfere with our quality time together. We also found ways to combine our passions, like volunteering for a cause we both care about. This allowed us to spend quality time together while making a positive impact in our community."

9. Financial Stress

Rajiv and Simran Singh, a couple from Chandigarh near Punjab, were struggling with financial stress which was affecting their relationship. Simran shares, "We were constantly worried about money and couldn't enjoy our time together due to the extra hours spent on looking for a second stream of income. We realized we needed to manage our finances together and reduce stress."

Rajiv adds, "We reviewed our expenses, set a budget, and found ways to cut back. We prioritized our relationship by finding low-cost activities, like having drinks at home and inviting friends over instead of going to bars, and budgeting trips based on our future vision to invest and save more. This helped us alleviate our financial stress and strengthen our relationship."

10. Lack of Ideas on What to Do

Ravi and Anjali, a couple who moved from New Delhi to Nagpur in Maharashtra after getting married, realized that they had fallen into a routine and were feeling bored. They decided to try new things together to reignite their relationship. "We began exploring our neighborhood and social media for fun rituals we could do together based on our mutual availability," shares Anjali.

"But after a year, we got bored with those too. So we dug deeper and looked for inspiration online and from friends." They found an orphanage that needed help on a weekly basis and volunteered there. They also tried other new activities like pottery classes and Salsa nights. "By trying new things together, we rediscovered our connection and enjoyed quality time in a fresh and exciting way," says Ravi.

In conclusion, spending quality time together is essential for maintaining a healthy and strong relationship. It allows couples to deepen their emotional connection, communicate better, and foster a sense of intimacy. Quality time can also keep the romance alive in a relationship, create new memories, and reduce stress. It is important for couples to make time for each other and prioritize their relationship, even amidst the demands of work and family responsibilities.

Thus, we at Baely are confident that the above real-life snippets will help you chart out quality time with your BAE! And when you do, don’t forget to write to us.

Looking for ideas for what you can do with your partner? Click here to discover unique and interesting ideas

Disclaimer:

The opinions expressed within this interview are the personal opinions of the protagonist/protagonists. The facts & statistics, the work profile details of the protagonist/ protagonists do not reflect the views of Baely or the Journalist. Neither Baely nor the Journalist hold any responsibility or liability for the same.

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