When we fight, one of us tries to stay calm and not make it a win-loss ego situation. It doesn't mean don't share your point of view, instead, wait for the nerves to have calmed down.
You know that saying, "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy"? It's true for relationships too. If you're just going to run errands, discuss chores, and then zone out in front of the television for "fun," you're missing a whole level of connection.
Little gestures go a long way in a relationship. Bear hugs, a good bye kiss before leaving for work, bringing home a small gift, or snack, etc are seemingly small deeds but have a great positive impact on a relationship.
Most couples avoid having difficult conversations that are necessary to create a life together. Instead, they try to avoid these issues and hope they would work themselves out. However, the truth is that they can't be on the same page without consistent communication.
Whenever she would do something that I didn't like, I would immediately go to a negative place. Over time I learnt to ask myself - What are other possibilities that may be more positive than what i am thinking? Assume she was trying to help. Asked myself the question - What’s another possibility?
I unknowingly started expecting my partner to be a reflection of myself, often asking "why can't you also" when pointing out things I do. But I realized that he brings his own strengths to the relationship, and expecting him to mirror me is not fair or healthy.